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By Misti Date: 2003 Sep 12 Comment on this Work [[2003.09.12.00.00.13618]] |
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i see you everyday on my way to work you have bumper stickers that scream your absolutely positively sure self to the world like the world gives a fuck the world is on its way to work or to the mall or to lunch at TGIFriday's or to Vinny's house to score some special k/crystal meth/ecstasy/acid the world does not care that God is your co-pilot or that your kid is on the honor roll or that you think darwin is burning in hell or that you back George Bush 110% just fucking go when the light turns green make your right turn make your exit outta my life and no i do not want to hear the latest hatred spewing rap song booming out your window and no i am not impressed by your american flag decals or FEAR THIS or GODDESS or the crucifix dangling from your rearview mirror i speak to you everyday on the telephone you demand prompt delivery and empathy ooooh yeah you have got stellar taste, honey good decision on that sixty dollar bra oh, you're drunk and sleepy and have nothing better to do at one o'clock in the morning than call up Victoria's Secret and spend a hundred bucks on stuff that will make you feel pretty and shiny and perky like Annette on the beach? i am so sorry oh yeah i know how that goes i wipe my ass with generic toilet paper i live on peanut butter and banana sandwiches and frosted cherry pop-tarts i can only afford to visit my mom once every two years i drive a used car that was a gift because i can't afford car payments i love my husband i love buying him surprises and doing little things to make his life better because he comes home from work and is too wound up from his shit job to talk or be affectionate and he snaps at me for painting a project in his favorite chair i am not sure of what or who i believe in or what will happen to me when i die i am not sure of the american dream a starter home and a baby by 35 with money set aside for medical emergencies and trips to vegas i do not weep when i hear the national anthem if i wave a flag it is the freak flag and yes i wave it high i am not sure i am even here at all i am fragile i am a forgotten sentence all i have is this love that has been given to me by beautiful chance by the horrid randomness of decided destiny all i have is this love that is a miracle because it happened at all and vague dreams and ideas of how life should be i have no bumper stickers i have no church i have a purple mix tape that includes two songs by Outkast and "Wherever I May Roam" by Metallica and the Roxy Music song my husband turned me onto and the Church song that plays in "Donnie Darko" i have no magazine subscriptions everything is up in the air and swirling like the white plastic snowflakes in a 99 cent snowglobe that features a badly painted santa claus in the center. |