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By wistful Date: 2005 Oct 21 Comment on this Work [[2005.10.21.13.21.25681]] |
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The phone can be a very obnoxious thing just after dawn. And if you are not a morning person, it continues to be obnoxious until you've had your first cup of coffee. Or three. The phone jangled at Eve insistently, and she glared at it, defying it for a full 2.5 rings before picking up the receiver. "Heeeello." Eve croaked in her first word of the day. She cleared her throat noisily. "Hiya! It's Tammi!" Eve could hear the perky little "i" at the end of her name like an extra exclamation point. "I couldn't wait to hear about your date last night! How did it go?" Eve could picture Tammi sitting at the end of her chair, bouncing with puppy-excitement. Eve tried to muster some semblance of enthusiasm, since very few of her friends were willing to risk setting her up on blind dates. She didn't want to alienate this one. "Oh, the date? Ken. Yeah, good guy. He's really... nice. And good-looking, like you said..." Eve's voice trailed off. She was running out of positive things to say. The line was quiet for a moment. "Ok," Tammi sighed. "What was wrong with him?" The image of Tammi in Eve's head had stopped bouncing and collapsed back into her chair. Eve started squirming in her own chair. "Well, it's just that, he's.... ". Now Eve sighed. "This is going to sound so stupid." "Spill it. He's handsome, he's nice, BUT..." "Fine. He was born in the Bay Area, right? He's lived here all his life! And for the last eight years, he's actually lived *in* San Francisco, arguably one of the most cosmopolitan cities in the country, if not the world!" "Right. San Francisco Bay Area native, just like you! I thought you'd like that!" The exclamation points had returned to Tammi's voice, but they were no longer perky. "So..." Eve squirmed some more. "So. I'm not saying this is specifically a problem, but it's just emblematic of our whole conversation, you know? Or rather, of our lack of conversation, more to the point." "What is?" "Tammi, he didn't know what an empanada is." "An empanada? You are eliminating him because of an empanada?" "Tammi, seriously. How can you live, I mean really *live* in a city like this and not have explored all of its diversity? Of culture, of art, of *food*? Food is very important to me, you know that. And how can you live here for 42 years and not know what an empanada is?!?" Tammi giggled, resigned. "Alright. Got it: 'Must be able to identify an empanada.' Do you have any other items on your list that I should use as criteria for the next guy?" Eve relaxed and giggled back. "Yeah. Add: 'Must know that the Lambada is, truly, the forbidden dance.' " |